Great joy...and sorrow

This last week has absolutely flown by with the addition of our new family member. The excitement of Caleb finally being with us is only increasing each day as he does something new or gives a new look. He has so many facial expressions that we are just doing our best to try and catch each one. He has changed our hearts and has already given both of us a fresh outlook on everything we do. While we have learned that this is not going to be easy; we have also learned that each day our love grows stronger for him and each other. I see Allison in a completely new way and love her with an increasingly deeper love. There is nothing sweeter than to watch her with Caleb. I have seen a softer side and stronger side to her that makes me even more grateful to share each day with her. I could not have even come close to imagining how great all of this would be.

The sorrow. This morning I had to face the facts that most bosses won't pay if I'm not at work. As I was getting ready for work and drinking my coffee I thought about how nice it was to get back into my routine. I ate my breakfast, grabbed my lunch and put on my "nice clothes". I told my mom goodbye, as she was flying back to Arkansas today. I kissed Allison goodbye and kissed Caleb goodbye and headed out to the car with a new confidence and pride. Then I got in the car and drove off to work and it all started...I was leaving for work and I wouldn't see my son for over 8 hours! I felt a pain that I have never felt before. I had no clue that it would be so hard to leave. All I could think about was how much I was going to miss today not being able to stare at him every second. This guy has made me a complete mess!! I know that everyone has said that "it will get easier" and trust me, I do appreciate the encouragement, but it sure didn't make things easier today!

5:00 has always been one of my favorite times of the day but has never been so sweet to see as today!